Divorce turns your world upside down. Getting over the heartache and adjusting to the new normal is one thing. Getting your head around the possibility of dating again is quite another. For some the idea of dipping your toes in the dating pool again is terrifying, and for others it can be exhilarating.
If you think you might be ready for dating after your divorce, here are some pointers:
· Be ready: some people are ready before the papers have been filed. For others, it will be years before they are ready to jump back in the dating pool. Don’t rush the process.
· Make sure you are truly over your ex and have grieved your marriage.
· Have a support system.
· Get to know you again: You might have been part of a couple for decades. It’s important to get to know yourself as an individual.
· Be positive. Attitude is everything!
· Be patient.
· Be honest.
· Talk to your kids: You are the adult. Do not let your kids make life decisions for you. However, it is vital that you keep them informed. Introduce them to the notion, or the reality, of you entering the dating scene in a slow and respectful way.
· Know what you want, and what you don’t.
· Don’t repeat past mistakes.
· Create rules with the ex.
· Open your heart…but only if and when you’re ready.
Many people benefit from having a sounding board to process and/or discuss these issues. Call Foundations Counseling to meet with someone to discuss the complex emotions you might be having about dating after divorce.